if jesus has the power to do that.....you know he might just be real.

okay so everything is under the bridge just about...this dream girl of mine. who i do hold very dear to me. who i've been trying sooo long to be with. is almost about to accept my love...and although i should take this as a compliment....it still ticks me off in that kind of funny way.....she says well with kids and stuff i want to teach them that Jesus is (well you know the whole christian thing). so she is looking at it as i need to believe as well because she doesn't want to tell the kid what she believes (you know jesus is the true way to heaven) and then have the kid come to me and say.....mom said this...and then i have to say well it's true for her but not true for me....so i take it as a compliment as she sees me in that way (more of a long term thing) but it sux too because well of what she wants as a future....something that i can't provide...something i know is about the only thing i can't provide is a true christian family...well at least at this point in time in my life.

SOOO BLAHHHHHH!!!!!

now onto the other thing.....paycheck today.....oh you think your going to be buying music equipment......fuckyou.

so going to work yesterday (today for me) and my tachometers of my MPH and RPM's went straight to 0 then later i go home....and my lights are frankly just barely usable (people can see me...at least) and on top of that if i gun it (gun it as for as my car is concerned) it would start hicupping and the lights almost went out along with the engine almost stalling.....soooo i have no clue what the hell is up....first i thought it might be a fuse but now that it's makeing the engine do stuff as well i'm definately counting that out......my mom's husband said it might be a battery issue (since i really don't know how old the battery is)...i hope so because i really REALLY would like to get some of this music stuff going. and if i have to spend more then a battery and fuses......i'm fucked for that....and might be fucked again with haveing no money to eat or pay my bills AGAIN!!!

anyway pray for me or something........please god let me know jesus is real too.....not jokeing either....i love this girl damn it.......don't fuck with me